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Joke of the Day
"[Describing guy who just mugged me to sketch artist] ""He was literally kermit the frog"""
Next Joke
"A woman walks into a bar. What makes you think she can drive any better?"
"How often do you use algebra? Equationally."
"WATER POLO INSTRUCTOR: ""Are you sure you know what you're doing?"" ME: [Adjusting the mask & snorkel on my horse] ""Of course I do."""
"What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? The bench can support a family of four."
"*goes to get phone out of car *sees car has been stolen *finds phone in back pocket OH THANK GOD"
"Brazone : when a woman wants you to always support her, but gets rid of you the moment she is home and comfortable."
"It's been a brutal heatwave with no respite, but things will finally cool off tomorrow and rain. I can't wait to complain about that."
"Who decided to call them a personal trainer and not a gym reaper?"
"What's the best part about having sex with a transsexual? Pretending it went all the way through"