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Joke of the Day

"Why can't female medical examiners have kids? Because nobody puts baby in a coroner. Hey, at least it was original, again I will see myself out."

"Tolkien once wrote a novel set in an office... It's titled, ""And My Fax""."

"Do you want to know how to keep a dummy intrigued? I'll tweet it tomorrow."

"Hi I'm German... Did you really expect me to make a joke?"

"I adopted a rescue dog early this morning... But she hasn't saved anyone all day and she's peed in the house twice. This is bullshit."

"What do you call jokes on Reddit? Sit-down comedy"

"Have you heard about one direction? It looks they took different directions"

"Apparently ""cool story, bro"" is not an acceptable substitute for ""congratulations"" when your friend calls and tells you she's pregnant."

"When your parents get old, you take care of them the way they took care of you when you were young. Which is why I gave my kids heroin."

"Why was the little strawberry sad? Her mommy was in a jam."