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Joke of the Day

"My buddies said I should sign up for a Golf Tournament I told them no, I always lose, Then they said it was for crippled children. I thought, well damn, maybe I could win this then."

"If you're feeling down, park in a handicap space and soon a bunch of strangers will tell you that there's nothing wrong with you!"

"What do you call it when George Thorogood farts on a throne? Air to the bone"

"My math teacher said I was average. How mean!"

"I wouldn't say Christmas gnomes are small. But they used to be lumberjacks on a mushroom farm!"

"I asked my wife to pick up some French bread from the grocery store But ciabatta roll instead."

"Silver and lead are sitting at a bar and gold walks in. Silver yells "" au, get outta here! """

"What would a midget be jealous of at a little kid? The kid is over 5 feet tall."

"Oh yeah I was in a gang in high school! Well not like a real gang, it was more of a Trigonometry Club. But we still flashed sines."

"What did they priest say when he got censered? Holy smoke!"