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Joke of the Day

"""class... raise your hand if you know what ""getting laid"" means"" *room of 4th graders is silent* *kid with heelys raises hand*"

"They say there are no stupid questions, but in every meeting there is one person who tries to prove this incorrect."

"What's the worst part about season 1 of Lost? The *pilot* episode."

"I'm starting a company that will sell electronic storage devices and almonds. I'm calling it ""CDs Nuts"""

"Why do so many new brides get crow's feet as soon as they're married? From squinting and saying, ""Suck what?"""

"Arjen Robben goes down easier than a thirsty tourist in Magaluf."

"[Me at job interview] And, how seriously does your company take allegations of witchcraft?"

"How was the Redditor with only one karma upvote able to look like he had five karma upvotes? He was a karma-karma-karma-karma, karma chameleon!"

"I hate people who say 'Age is just a number' Age is clearly a word."

"I was at an ATM and this old lady asked me... ...to help check her balance, so I pushed her over."