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Joke of the Day
"How does Hitler line people up to get ready for mass genocide? Jew by Jew"
Next Joke
"Hey fat people, a venti caramel mocchiato w/ whipped cream isn't coffee, its a sundae."
"It's actually a good thing money doesn't grow on trees because I've killed every plant I've ever owned."
"Have you guys heard of the movie constipation? No, that's because it hasn't come out yet."
"How do you capture a polar bear? 1. Dig a hole in the ice. 2. Place a bunch of peas around the hole 3. When the bear comes up to take a pea, you kick him in the ice hole."
"I just want to win the Powerball lottery and eat unlimited carbs for the rest of my days."
"Nurse: Doctor this man needs an IV! Roman Empire doctor: OF WHAT? HE NEEDS 4 OF WHAT?!"
"Did you hear about the man with no penis? He went home and gave his wife a right bollocking."
"Her heart was in the right place.. In her chest to the left"
"An entire generation does not know what the hell is happening when a movie pans over to a wall calendar and the pages magically fly away."