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Joke of the Day
"I have a terrible habit of telling people when I have to take a shit. Heh, gotcha."
Next Joke
"Self Respect is... Washing your hands before you take a piss. ...or rather, leave one."
"*a friend tells me their problems* me: mhm, ok, have you tried eating about it?"
"At least once a day I say ""nice to meet you"" to someone I've already met which is a great feeling for all involved."
"The United States ruined Hiroshima. Which American city did Japan ruin? Detroit"
"What is the hardest part of telling a good gay joke? Keeping a straight face"
"My dancing style can best be described as ""Guy On Maury Who Just Found Out He Isn't The Father."""
"My family used to be in the steal and iron business My dad would steal and my mom would iron."
"The awesome moment when you're telling a lie and your best friend notices and joins you"
"I went out for Chinese last night, I told the waiter that the chicken was rubbery... He thanked me."