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Joke of the Day

"A photon walks into a hotel..... ..... And is asked if he needs help with his luggage. The photon replies, ""No thanks, I'm traveling light."""

"An American & Mexican are talking. American: ""Your Government needs to spy on your people, man. You guys have a drug problem."" Mexican: ""What drug problem? We get drugs pretty easily!"""

"What's big and gray and comes in quarts? An elephant"

"I saw some crippled kid getting picked on the other day... He got kinda upset with me when I told him to stand up for himself."

"My friend texted saying she was threatened by an organization. ""And their name was"" ""ISIS"" ""Calm down! Is who?"""

"I haven't gained weight. I'm just retaining cookies."

"What did the princess say when she got to the ball? garglgarglgarglgarglgargl"

"[installing program] Operation Status: 1 min left Me: Yes! Finally! *30 minutes later* Operation Status: 60 mins left Me: Wait. What?"

"The cemetery by my house is soo popular... ...people are dying to get in."

"I was going to give him a nasty look, but he already had one."