138188

Joke of the Day

"what happens when the world stops existing,when all the stars and planets don't exist anymore? Half life 3 will go into early development."

"There is a new Barbie doll on the market - Darth Vader Barbie ...with plastic helmet; pull the string and she sounds like James Earl Jones"

"I have a cut on my leg Doc ""Yeah that legs gotta go sir"" But its a tiny cut ""Sorry, I cant save it"" *sharks fake doctor outfit falls off*"

"Two greek anarchists are sitting together making molotov cocktails. One says ""so, who are we going to throw these at?"" the other replies: ""what are you, a fucking intellectual?"""

"I would never let my kids go see an orchestra... Too much sax and violins."

"Donald Trump is elected president..."

"What's a pirate's favorite sexual partner? Can't legally consent because they're retarrrrrrrrded."

"A truck containing 10,000 unborn fetuses ran off a cliff. Luckily, nobody was injured."

"What's a tongue twister? When your tang gets all tongueled up."

"How are Women and Hurricanes Similar? They both come in hot and wet and **TAKE THE LAWN CHAIRS WE BOUGHT TOGETHER, SARAH YOU BITCH!**"