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Joke of the Day

"I've always wondered what it was like to have a stalker... So I guess I'll ask the guy hiding in my closet."

"Women always call me ugly until they find out how much money I make... Then they call me ugly and poor."

"What's the first step to making your favorite Jewish dish? Preheat the oven"

"Telling someone they can't be sad because others have it worse is like telling someone they can't be happy because others have it better."

"Interviewer: How do you hit those high notes? Adam Levine: I sold my soul to the devil. Interviewer: Excuse me? Adam Levine: Practice."

"How to get rid of crabs First, shave off half your pubes. Then light the other half on fire, as they run to the shaved side, stab them with a knife."

"What do you call a monster with a wooden head? Edward."

"What kind of donuts did Bob Marley prefer? The ones with Jam in"

"A pessimist is always alone. An optimist is always two away from a threesome."

"How do you make estrogen? Don't pay her."