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Joke of the Day

"What did the poor ghetto dweller get for Christmas? Your bicycle."

"I used to be in a band called ""Frequent Urination"". You might have heard of us. We had several number ones."

"Yes Yes Yes !!! Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. ""Yes"" is the answer."

"The hardest part about eating vegetables. What's the hardest part of eating vegetables? The wheelchair. Badum-tss!"

"I'm going to kiss every guy I see with a ""Kiss me, I'm Irish"" shirt in hopes that they'll never wear that shirt again."

"I wouldn't call it 'passive aggressive', but I do send the glitter Christmas cards to the people who annoy me."

"Filling out application for new health insurance. Do you guys think ""sick of everyone & everything"" is considered a pre-existing condition?"

"A woman walks into a bar and asks the bar tender for a double entendre... So he gives it to her."

"One liners are great. Two liners are better."

"When Mr. Maxwell's wife left him he couldn't sleep. ""She took the bed!"""