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Joke of the Day
"Turkey shot down Syrian helicopter at the border. How did they train it to do that?"
Next Joke
"There once was a Little Girl named Sue... She likes a lot of celebrities. But, every person she idolises commits suicide. Because they're Sue's idols! Hahaha?"
"What's the secret to a great joke The timing. The timeing."
"""Sorry but It's me or the label maker."" [takes GIRLFRIEND label off her shirt] ""Thank y-"" [sticks on a label that says EX-GIRLFRIEND]"
"my girlfriends dad asked me what I do but apparently your daughter wasn't the answer"
"A pedophile walks into the woods with a little girl... Girl: I'm scared Pedo: Me too, I need to walk home alone."
"I won $3 million on the Lottery this weekend. I decided to donate a quarter of it to Charity. Now I have $2,999,999.75 and she has $.25"
"What's the similarity between pessimists and people with a phobia of sausages? They both fear the wurst"
"Any salad can be a Caesar salad if you stab it enough."
"How does Harry Potter get down the stairs? By walking. J.K. Rowling..."