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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the sequel to Snakes on a Plane with giant, poisonous centipedes? It got cancelled. There wasn't enough legroom."

"My pants are also my iPhone grease wipes."

"How do you get out of the stomach of an elephant? Run around until you get pooped out"

"Why are black people so tall? Because their Knee Grows! (Told to me buy a black friend so dont be calling me a racist)"

"What do you get when you cross a cow with an octopus? Reprimand from the university ethics board and immediate withdrawal of all research grants."

"Whenever someone says, ""Good question"" I never hear their answer because I'm too busy congratulating myself for asking such a good question."

"Teacher: Where is the English Channel ? Pupil: I don't know my TV doesn't pick it up"

"What do you call an arranged marriage between two communists who don't like each other? A so-be-it union."

"I need someone really bad. Are you really bad?"

"If Santa is black... and he is called father Christmas, that explains why children can't see him."