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Joke of the Day

"D'you want to hear a spoiler for the Jumanji remake? Robin Williams dies"

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"What's the difference between a Jew and a canoe? The canoe occasionally tips."
"*Chooses paper towels instead of the hand dryer right as a tree walks into the bathroom*"
"Watch Forrest Gump *feel inspired *toss orthotics out, go for jog *1/2 block later, keel over and die next to shit happens bumper sticker"
"With subpar graphics and no discernable plot, TurboTax is, hands down, the worst video game I have ever played."
"Why are some girls so odd? Because they can't even."
"I'm starting to think my wife is only having sex with me to improve her FitBit stats."
"Five days of the week, my body is a temple. The other two, it's an amusement park! "
"Last week I ordered a vault and some speakers Today they arrived, safe and sound."
"The KKK, Black Lives Matter And Westboro Baptist Church Throw Urine At Each Other Outside RNC. Reports are still unclear as to what pissed them all off."