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Joke of the Day

"Deez Nutz GOTEM!"

"What does Michael Jackson do when he gets kids to the top of the Empire State building? Tosses them off."

"Go for someone who is not only proud to have you but will also take every risk just to be with you."

"There's no greater waste of time in life than wishing a one-year-old a happy birthday."

"Breathing heavily, she asked me what I can give her. Me: ""I'll give you a hint, it starts with a D"" Her: ""Oh yess, I can't wait!"" Me: ""That's right, get ready for some disappointment!"""

"Did you know the Mods on this sub are actually cows? Evidence listed below. [remooved]"

"""I mean if you do the math the most weight I can really gain from the pound of pumpkin pie I ate tonight is only one pound"" I thought fatly."

"Collection Litter by Phil D Basket"

"Why do wrestlers love video games? Because of the lutte"

"Van Gogh: ""Dude, I saw this hella vase of sunflowers today."" Gauguin: ""Pics, or it didn't happen."" [van gogh pulls out oil paints & easel]"