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Joke of the Day

"What did the snowman do when he saw a snow blower go by? Pull down his pants."

"What does an old lady's pussy taste like? Depends."

"There's a cure for kleptomania! They make a pilfer that."

"When does a female deer need money? When she doesn't have a buck."

"GF asked ""Can you hand me my shoes?"" Me: ""No, but I can feet them to you"""

"You're so beautiful Sometimes I have to photoshop you to make you look less attractive! - Zach Anner"

"What's the difference between a gay guy and a politician? (NSFW) One will screw you in the asshole The other is an asshole screwing you"

"What's the difference between the calendar and you? A calendar has a date on Valentine's day."

"I once knew a soldier who suffered through both mustard gas and pepper spray. He was a seasoned veteran."

"A Rabbi, a lawyer, and a Priest are on a sinking ship. The Rabbi says, ""Save the children!"" The lawyer says ""Fuck the children!"" ... The Priest says, ""Do we have time?"""