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Joke of the Day
"Don't ever try taking off a penguin's little tuxedo. All that's under there is a dead penguin."
Next Joke
"Oh you wear sunglasses inside? lt must be sunny on planet cool."
"What do you call it when you torture corn to death? Macabre!"
"There's a gang going through our town, systematically shoplifting clothes in size order ... The police believe they're still at large."
"Knock Knock Kid: knock knock Dad: Who's there? Kid: Hatch Dad: Hatch who? Kid: Bless You."
"Why can any hamburger run the mile in under four minutes? Because it's a FAST food!"
"""If you film it, they will cum."" That's the tagline for my new baseball porno, Field of Creams. Based on the life of Hoeless Joe."
"It's a sad moment when you realize the trash goes out more often than you do."
"5-year-old: I missed chicken nugget day at daycare. Me: So? 5-year-old: My life is falling apart."
"It's funny how you can do nice things for people all the time and they never notice. But, once you make one mistake, it's never forgotten."