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Joke of the Day
"""LOL, NOPE"" -Me, 25 seconds into the marathon"
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"Why are the Greeks so in debt? They demand credit for everything"
"How do you make a duck sing soul music? Put it in the microwave until it's Bill Withers."
"Lazy thought by my girlfriend Her: ""Why is it Bees Knees, Why not Bees Nuts?"" (Deez nuts)"
"What does 83 year old pussy taste like? Depends"
"From now on when skinny girls say they're fat I'm just gonna be like, ""Yup"" & walk away."
"Why there should be a February 30th So dentists can have a day to celebrate"
"What has 2 eyes, 2 belly buttons and 2 legs? 2 pirates."
"I told my wife I love her like a Brit loves soccer... She looked worried and said, ""So you're going to get drunk and yell at me?"" EDIT: correcting auto-correct."
"What is a Germans favorite letter? Any letter before the last. Because they're not 'z's"