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Joke of the Day

"I just got smiled at by a lovely cashier who has plenty of teeth, but clearly only brushes her favorites."

"A guy did squats at a talent show... He called it a stand up routine."

"while memes are a great gateway to wasting your life away online,, they're not for everyone . ask your doctor if memes are right for you"

"Difference between computers and woman Unlike computers a woman will reject a 3 1/2 inch floppy."

"A man walks into a bar and tells a joke that has been posted on reddit before. I only know because no one would shut the fuck up about it."

"It looks like your face caught on fire and someone tried to put it out with a hammer."

"What do you call a lamppost in Niger? Progress."

"I was in work the other day when a stunning Thai girl walked in. She was gorgeous. all I could think was 'don't get a boner, don't get a boner, don't get a boner.' She *did*."

"What did the hopeless romantic baker say to the dough? You're my life's devotion. I knead you!"

"Justin Beiber's entire entourage has abandoned him... after hearing you can catch cancer from cunts."