134396

Joke of the Day

"Companies should use chromosomes in advertising Because sex cells."

"Shot pool with my 15yo son. Taught him a valuable lesson. You can restart a video game 1000 times. You can only lose your allowance once."

"Heard a friend bragging about his one night stand Whatever mate, i've got two night stands. One either side of my bed."

"8 friends share a pizza. Why did one friend not get any? He didn't get his fair share: one over eight."

"""No, YOU'VE had too much to drink!"" ~Me, to this bar stool"

"The U.S. Army developed a pizza that stays good for 3 years. Finally, those billions in military spending paid off. Your move, Al Qaeda."

"What's the similarity between smoking a cigarette and eating pussy? The taste changes the closer you get to the butt."

"A black guy walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender asks him, ""Where did you get that thing?"" Parrot says, ""Africa."""

"Why did the bus stop? Because it saw the zebra crossing."

"What's the difference between a genealogist and a gynecologist? A genealogist looks up the family tree, a gynecologist looks up the family bush."