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Joke of the Day

"A book fell on my head today... I can only blame myshelf."

"To prepare her for real life I make my daughter pretend to tweet on a toy phone when she's taking a crap."

"Not to be a Scrooge, but if you play or even hum along with Christmas music before December 10, you should be sent to a concentration camp."

"I would love to buy a Harley Davidson motorcycle... But I can't afford all the shirts."

"Osama=Crabs What do Osama Bin Laden and crabs have in common? They both irritate Bush."

"Why didn't the penguin close on his mortgage? He had cold feet."

"What idiot called him Steve Jobs instead of Mac Daddy"

"Why did the mother bear ask the baby bear to wear shoes before he ran through the forest? Because he was barefooted!!!"

"How do you turn a computer into a zombie? Send it a byte. Kind of lame but I couldn't help myself."

"Met this chinese guy with the surname Shen. His name's Eric. As in Eric Shen. Have him for more than 4hours, call a doctor!"