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Joke of the Day

"Children are demo versions of humans."

"So my girlfriend asked me to make love to her like in the movies.... So I pulled out and busted all over her face....apparantly we don't watch the same movies"

"My boss at Walmart said I have to stop Febreezing the homeless and that they aren't homeless, they're customers."

"You know how light travels faster than sound? Thats why some people seem bright until they speak."

"Why are boys faster than girls? Because they have ball bearings and a stick shift."

"Tequila doesn't make me drunk and disorderly, it just seems that way, cuz Police Reports are all written by cops."

"Did you know that 2 x 10 is the same 2 x 11 One is twenty and the other is twenty two."

"Not all men are stupid... Some are still single."

"Every time you make a ""your mom"" joke, I call my mom to check. Most of you are liars."

"there is no way you can prove that babies grow and are not instead replaced overnight with entirely new but slightly larger babies"