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Joke of the Day

"What do I call my pasta friend? Ma Caroni! (my crony)"

"Why shouldn't you protest wound treatment? It won't get better if you picket it."

"Want to read my favorite dirty Jewish word? splurge"

"What can you put at the end of a sentence, to make it funnier? The punchline."

"My fake plant died Because I didn't pretend to water it."

"My wife and I were supposed to have a conversation about my erectile disfunction. It never came up."

"""Go down, Moses."" And he did. And that's why the ladies loved him."

"Q. How can you tell a bagpiper with perfect pitch? A. He can throw a set into the middle of a pond and not hit any of the ducks."

"When driving: *shakes fist at pedestrians* When walking: *shakes fist at motorists* When running: *shakes fist at the murderer chasing me*"

"Feminists are basically Lesbians who don't want to admit it."