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Joke of the Day

"Chocolate fountains are so 20th century. This is the future. At my wedding we're having a burrito fountain."

"""Dude, we should swap spacesuits. Just for a laugh."" ""Ha, yeah ok."" [swaps suits] ""Now we sh-"" ""You took a shit in this, didn't you?"""

"Well kids, when a man and woman love each other very much, he erects a monument for her, but in his pants."

"There is only one house song. It's 38,000 minutes long."

"Reddit is really a Green Community, considering that the joke's on you."

"If the dove is the bird of peace, what is the bird of true love? The Swallow"

"How do the Muslims like their eggs cooked? Sunni side up. I know this is a Shiite joke."

"How does Harry Potter go down a hill? By walking. JK. Rowling."

"I used to be an adventurer like you... But then I took an arrow to the knee."

"Q: ""Have you heard about the new pirate movie?"" A: ""It's rated aaarrrrrrrr."""