133093

Joke of the Day

"What did the egg say to the boiling water? ""It's going to take me a while to get hard, I just got laid by this chick"""

"I got kicked out of the zoo for feeding the ducks ... to the alligators... All I wanted was to complete the circle of life."

"I invented a new golf ball that will automatically go in the hole if it gets to within 4 inches. Do NOT carry them in your back pocket."

"OMG you got a new boyfriend? congratulations, who is it this week?"

"#1: My personality is 30% the last movie I watched."

"My wife can suffer in silence louder than anyone I know."

"Girls hate it when you give them Christmas presents with an implied expectation, like an iron, a food processor, or knee pads."

"Intellectual Jokes as in: Yo mama so wide she didn't fit through the Thermopylae Pass or she so fat she didn't fit through the last circle in Dante's Inferno. Let's get this thread ballin'."

"What has 72 teeth and holds back the hulk? My zipper."

"What do you call it when two Vietnamese people meet? A Nguyen-Nguyen situation"