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Joke of the Day

"Fade Away by Peter Out"

"The ""letters to the editor"" page of your local newspaper is like Twitter for the elderly."

"Why did Hitler break up with his girlfriend? She was a nein out of ten"

"Judging by all the cracking and popping noises my body makes when I work out, I'd say I'm about 74% Rice Krispies."

"What do you call the underground slave trade? The black market."

"Why is kim jong un such an asshole? he's mentally il."

"What is a fat kids' favourite sounding instrument at school? The dinner bell."

"You know that feeling when you've had a long day at work, you drive home and nothing is going your way? It's probably because you're driving in the wrong lane."

"Policeman: Didn't you hear me whistle at you? Woman Driver: Sure but I don't flirt when I drive."

"- Why do you think I spend too much time at my computer? - Well dear... Every time I ask you to close the windows you answer with ""Please wait while your computer shuts down""..."