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Joke of the Day

"A pair of jumper cables walk into a bar... A pair of jumper cables walk into a bar. Immediately, the bartender walks up and says: ""Hey! You guys can hang out here...just don't try and start anything."""

"Why is manna from heaven like horse hay? Both are food from aloft!"

"Why should you never let a non-metal drive a train? Because they're poor conductors! (I know they're called Engineers but cut me some slack, I thought of this in the 9th grade.)"

"A depressed Storm Trooper goes to the bar for some jager shots. He goes home sober."

"I need to pluck my eyebrows before they cast Eugene Levy to play me in the movie of my life."

"will you marry me? no, marry Christmas!"

"Did you hear about the chickpeas who took a tumble? It was falafel."

"The real joke isn't always in the comments Sometimes it's in the Whitehouse..."

"How many palindromes do I know of? Not a ton"

"""The New York Times"" isn't the punchline... but... http://www.politico.com/blogs/media/2015/01/correction-of-the-day-200768.html?ml=tl_4"