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Joke of the Day

"Thanks a lot, gourmet cupcake shops. You've taken a perfectly good treat and turned it into an asshole."

"A boy was born of an Indian, Chinese, Irish, and Italian grandmother... They couldn't settle on a name, until it hit them! They named him Ravi O. Lee Sorry"

"She told me I was a talented lover I told her I studied a broad."

"who discovered Snickers??? I'm on the Paleo diet, except I'm the caveman who discovered Snickers."

"How many babies does it take to open a door? It depends on how hard you can throw."

"I don't know why smokey the bear carries a shovel, but it scares the shit out of me."

"I don't see dead people, but I do always see spiders that aren't really there."

"My doctor just used a tongue depressor on me so I'm going out for ice cream to cheer the little guy up."

"How do you turn a fruit into a vegetable? AIDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"I know someone who puts raisins in meatballs so don't even try to talk to me about psychos"