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Joke of the Day

"A boy was born of an Indian, Chinese, Irish, and Italian grandmother... They couldn't settle on a name, until it hit them! They named him Ravi O. Lee Sorry"

"2 peanuts were walking down a dark alley one was assaulted"

"What do nuclear physicists do when they have time off? They go fission."

"Some people are like slinkies Not really good for much, but bring a smile to your face when pushed down the stairs"

"What kind of tie is best to wear in a fight? Muay Thai"

"Who's bigger? Mr. Bigger? Or Mr. Bigger's baby? The baby, because it is a little Bigger."

"Shock me once, shame on you. Shock me twice, that's just revolting."

"""If I act like I'm asleep he'll leave, If I act like I'm asleep he'll leave, if I act like I'm asleep he'll leave"" - Me getting pulled over"

"I opened a company selling landmines that look like prayer mats ... Business is booming and Prophets are going through the roof."

"Big things DO NOT always come in small packages! I wish someone had told me the truth before I pounced on this adorable midget. Poor fella."