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Joke of the Day

"Why don't pediatricians like to wait? Because they have little patients."

"What's the difference between a large chested lobster and a dirty bus stop? One's a busty crustacean and the other is a crusty bus station."

"""ARE YOU IN THERE LOOKING AT GUYS STARING AT THEIR COMPUTERS AGAIN?!?!"" - porn's parents"

"Saw Interstellar over the weekend & was totally glued to my seat. The movie was OK but the getting-glued-to-my-seat thing ruined it for me."

"What do you call a Snorlax that wants to win a race? A cab."

"The Past Present and Future... The Past Present and Future walk into a bar. It was tense."

"My roommate has a red face all the time. He says it's because of a skin condition but I think he's secretly appropiating native American culture."

"How many jews died in the holocaust? Not enough"

"What did one of Frankenstein's ears say to the other? I didn't know we lived on the same block."

"So Halloween is fast approaching... Where I can get one of those cool Guy Fieri masks that all the anarchists are wearing?"