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Joke of the Day

"Birth Paddy's wife was ready to give birth so he rushes her to hospital.On arrival the nurse asks ""How dilated is she?""To which paddy relies,""Oh Jaysus we""re both over the fucking moon!!..:)"

"If you are trading Cephalopods, it's important that you exchange those that are of equal size and value. You know.... Squid Pro Quo"

"Stephen Hawking believes he's solved a huge mystery about black holes ...and he'll keep believing as long as we all play along, ok? He's adorable."

"Sometimes I think these Kardashians are just doing stuff for the attention."

"My wife left me for a fisherman. Poor guy's still reeling."

"Why did the chicken cross the road? Because netizens were showing shallow sympathy for #YulinDogMeatFestival on the other side."

"that coat doesn't break wind... if it doesn't fart it's not a coat."

"Sometimes when I'm taking a dump, I just have to chuckle. You know, for shits and giggles."

"Some chick told me to get lost so I bought every season on DVD."

"Q: Did you hear about the peanut in the hospital? A: He was assaulted."