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Joke of the Day

"DATING TIP: show her your hula hoop skills. keep adding hula hoops. you're now a slinky. everybody loves a slinky."

"The closest I've come to being an athlete is using Adobe Acrobat."

"What did the Seattle-based baker say to her apprentice? Someday you will bake like I bake."

"What do you have to know to be a real estate salesman? Lots."

"Apparently half of men have a problem with premature ejaculation The rest of us just don't think its a problem."

"[Job Interview] *okay, he can't find out I'm a wolf* *fixes tie* *checks breath* IS THAT A PICTURE OF YOUR BABY SHE LOOKS DELICIOUS"

"The cancelled marathon runners should seriously run through the boroughs with supplies. I said it earlier as a joke, now I say it for real."

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Cartoon ! Cartoon who ? Cartoon up just fine she purrs like a cat !"

"Snoop Dogg seems to be investing in a company that will deliver weed to your house in 10 minutes... Sadly, the name Instagram is taken."

"What did O say to Q? Dude, your dick's hanging out."