132104

Joke of the Day

"Kids are so inquisitive. ""Will robots ever take over the world?"" Me: ""Almost certainly."" ""But when? Before I die?"" ""A bit before, yes."""

"Why does the communist party hate planes? Because they're always Stalin"

"employee: over 100 ppl were killed by the dinosaurs again CEO: my God [10yrs later] CEO: what if we made a dinosaur theme park again lmao"

"Change the last word of your favorite movie title to ""Impregnator"" e.g. Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's **Impregnator** Transformers, Revenge of the **Impregnator**"

"Kids, on Christmas Eve Santa WILL break in to your house. He wants to STEAL YOUR COOKIES. If he has an ""accident"" the law is on your side."

"Q: Why was the insect kicked out of the wildlife preserve? A: It was a litterbug."

"What's a Christian's favourite chord progression? G,Esus."

"I was trying to get my PC to run faster... So I painted it black but now it won't turn on"

"Apparently one in three people cheat. I wonder if it's my wife or my girlfriend."

"A new vending machine opened up at isis headquarters today... It was called the allahu snackbar."