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Joke of the Day

"My doctor said i shouldn't just binge drink all weekend. I tried taking his advice but can't drink a bottle of Jack Daniels every day."

"Youtube Ads Youtube can insta load a commercial but my 2 minute video takes 10 minutes to buffer."

"I got my bucket list mixed up with my shopping list Swam with dolphin-safe tuna."

"1. Put on clown shoes. 2. Sit in toilet stall with feet pulled up. 3. Wait for someone to enter other stall. 4. Slowly lower feet to floor"

"Which star do the dinosaurs like best? The one that keeps getting bigger"

"What do you call a nosy pepper? A pepper that gets jalapeno business!"

"Public speaking is a lot like being on a topless beach. It's only hard for the first few minutes."

"How did the Scot die? He got kilt."

"Calling someone ""exotic looking"" is a polite way to say, ""I might be a little bit racist but I'd love to see you naked."""

"I don't know why beer companies bother with an expiration date... it's never going to make it anywhere near that."