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Joke of the Day

"Tourist in America I was going to take my wife to visit all the sites where they protested the police shooting of innocent black men. But i've only got 6 months...plus community service."

"He who smiles in a crisis has found someone to blame."

"I went to the doctors this morning as I had a strawberry growing from my ear. He gave me some cream for it."

"Girl On Fire by Alicia Keyes would be a great theme song for a Vagisil commercial!"

"I don't worry about Friday the 13th. It's bad luck to be superstitious."

"I've come to the conclusion that these Paul Walker jokes aren't funny... Cause I called his family and told them 5 of my BEST ones. They didn't laugh at ANY of them."

"I met a one-legged waitress at IHOP... Her name was Ilene."

"camouflage training Drill Sergeant: ""I DID NOT SEE YOU AT CAMOUFLAGE TRAINING THIS MORNING CORPORAL!!!!"" Corporal: ""Thank you sir."""

"Son, I wanted to talk to you about masturbation... If you do it too much you'll go blind Dad I'm over here Edit: a letter Heard that in middle school thought you guys might get a chuckle out of it"

"Whats the difference between a fetus and a meme? You cant kill a Meme"