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Joke of the Day

"*Listening to red hot chili peppers* Me: You call that music? I can't even hear anything! Worker: Sir, stop putting produce to your ear."

"Have you ever tasted Ethiopian food... Neither have they."

"Why is there no market for white tires? Because black tires makes your car run faster"

"My wife and I were happy for 22 years...... Then we met!"

"Teacher:""To which family does the elephant belong ?"" Pupil:""I don't know nobody I know owns one !"""

"What is the difference between a hormone and an enzyme? You can't hear an enzyme."

"Why did the thumbs-up become the universal symbol for approval? ""hey let me show u my weirdest finger because i'm down with what ur saying"""

"Two hunters were driving down a narrow two lane road in an off-road jeep, and saw a sign that said 'Bear Left'... They turned around and went home."

"How many optometrists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One... or two? One... or two?"

"What do you call a vampire who owns a restaurant? Count Spatula"