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Joke of the Day
"And they lived apathetically ever after."
Next Joke
"The enemy of my enemy of my enemy of my enemy of my enemy is Kevin Bacon."
"Wanna read a really dirty joke? A white horse fell in the mud"
"How does one even? It simply doesn't, because it's odd."
"What do math majors get when they graduate? A radian. Math majors don't use degrees."
"Irony Just an alloy of Fe and Yttrium"
"[having sex] Her: HARDER! ME: Divide 110 into two parts so that one will be 150% of the other. What are the 2 numbers? Her: 44&66 HARDER!"
"It's 2080. Every living human is named Taylor. Dogs are the size of hamsters. The iPhone 47 is the size of a parachute. Weed is mandatory."
"""You have a date? With who?"" [Sees a fishing boat] ""Uh, her name is Net..."" [Sees someone with a booger] ""Flicks! Net Flicks! Wait. Dammit."""
"I attempted smoky eye makeup for a holiday party tonight, but instead it looks like I survived a bar fight, so I'm going with that story."