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Joke of the Day

"I have been checking Facebook less and less. If this continues, I'll eventually forget about all those people for the 2nd time."

"What joke would piss off any redditor? Update 1: Punchline removed."

"I now have 8 apps to communicate with the same people."

"The school phoned me today and said, ""Your son's been telling lies."" I replied, ""Well, tell him he's bloody good - I ain't got any kids!"""

"*hands you a marijuana* ""This one's called Air Bud. It'll make you play basketball. Also it might turn you into a golden retriever."""

"I got fired from the banana plantation for ""wasting resources"" All i did was throw out the Bent ones"

"One day I'd like to donate to the porn industry for all the free porn I've watched. They've gotten me through some hard times."

"Jews be like Nah Way is Jesus the son of God And Christians be like Yahwah!"

"Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? The P is silent"

"Text Flirting Tip: Don't reply immediately. Play it cool, wait for a minute, then eventually forget to reply and ruin everything."