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Joke of the Day

"Why are jalapenos so annoying? Because they get jalapeno business."

"A Rabbi, a priest and a minister walk into a bar The bartender asks - is this some kind of joke?"

"No one cares if you go to the bathroom. In fact, you are the only one who gives a shit."

"What do you call drunken cunnilingus? Lick'er."

"One man asks another, ""What's the best thing about 28 year olds?"" ""There's twenty of them,"" replies the pedophile"

"MY DENTIST ASKED HIS ASSISTANT TO SUCTION (THE WATER OUT OF MY MOUTH)BUT I THOUGHT HE WAS TALKING TO ME SO I SUCKED HIS FINGER. IM MORTIFIED"

"Babe, your cuter than a puppy at an animal shelter, Cuz i want to take you home!"

"I'm a simple man *bites a pinecone* I enjoy simple things *tosses a gun into a lake* that's why I decided to let these bees live in my skull"

"A maternity ward was overflowing one national holiday It was Labor day"

"Her: I'm leaving you Me: Because of the ancient Roman literature puns? Her: Yah Me: But Aenid you"