130185

Joke of the Day

"When I was 6 my cousin stole my boomerang. The next day his parents died in a car crash. Andy, if you're reading this, I want my boomerang."

"Why do Firemen have bigger balls than Policemen? Because they sell more tickets."

"What do you get when you put a woman's face on a $10 bill? $2.23 in change."

"Exams are like girlfriends! - difficult 2 understand - too many questions - more explanations are needed And results are most of the time failure..."

"[friend consoling me through bad break up] ""You need to eat, Luke. You can't just sit there"" *i start crying more* Karen & I used to eat"

"I like to ask people what their sign is and then read them a completely different sign's horoscope just to hear them say ""that's so me!"""

"Why did cavemen drag their women around by the hair and not the feet? Because if they drug them by the feet the would have filled with dirt."

"What does Sean Connery do with his quiche? He opensh hish doorsh with them."

"Why does Mexico always underperform in the summer olympics? Because everyone that can run, swim or jump is in USA."

"A baby's laughter is one of the most beautiful sounds you will ever hear. Unless it's 3am. And you're home alone. And you don't have a baby"