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Joke of the Day

"Ask your doctor why there are claw marks on the wall. Ask your doctor to stop growling. Ask your doctor to stop climbing and smelling you."

"How do you know you're playing a Jewish Football team (American Football) On defense, they only run the Dime Formation"

"Statistics show that 1 in 20 of us live next door to a paedo... ...not me though, I live next door to two stunning 8 year olds."

"My girlfriend and I have rough sex. It's not violent, it's just poorly defined."

"The Queen Said If I had Balls I'd Be The King.. The king laughed... not because he wanted to because he had two."

"You can't always get what you want, but if you cry loud enough you'll at least have the satisfaction of making everyone really uncomfortable"

"How can you tell the Ethiopian diplomat at a political function? He's the one with the gold Rolex around his neck."

"Two guys from Michigan wake up in Hell....... ...and they go about there day, and live there daily lives as citizens of Hell, Michigan."

"I almost got fired for watching internet porn at work. Instead I got fired for masturbating."

"I was skeptical Apple was using child labor until my iPod arrived and engraved on it was, ""Help! So hungry! Send Lunchables!"""