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Joke of the Day

"Just took a bite of a gluten-free slice of pizza & my stomach made a sad noise & I was all ""I know, buddy. I know."""

"A man asks his blind daughter what her favorite color is... She responds ""My favorite color is orange. It is the new black after at all."""

"My awesomeness, is second only to my modesty!"

"Why did the ordinary man eat all the magic mushrooms? Because he wanted to be a fungi."

"Why can't a prostitute count to 70? Because 69's a mouthful."

"Did you hear about the crime that happened in a parking garage? It was wrong on so many levels."

"Sometimes I wake up grumpy.. Other times I let her sleep"

"ME: I have chronic pain. It flares up whenever someone challenges my beliefs FRIEND: That's not really how chronic pain works ME: ow owwww"

"Is it any wonder men have been obsessed with sex since biblical times? After all, Adam was ribbed for his own pleasure"

"Some women bounce back quickly after pregnancy.. some just bounce"