12924

Joke of the Day

"Relationship status~ Siri saw my browser history & now she isn't talking to me either"

"My daughter called Neapolitan ice cream ""three-way"" ice cream & I'm not sure I'll correct her cuz I'm a horrible person & it makes me laugh."

"never trust a business that uses Papyrus font"

"Your mother has the prettiest teeth I ever came across."

"Your daughter seems to have nice boyfriends. They all seem to be involved in community service."

"Q: Why did the girl loaf of stale bread slap the boy loaf of stale bread? A: Because he tried to get fresh."

"We can't really blame Donald Trump... I mean look at China; they built a wall and have almost no Mexicans."

"At a job interview I poured some water into a cup and it overflowed slightly. ""Nervous?"" asked the interviewer. I responded, ""No, I always give 110%."""

"A cop stops a drunk man and asks ""how high are you?"" The man replies. ""That is wrong English. You should say 'Hi how are you?'"""

"""I'll take the Batmobile. Robin, you take the--"" [Robin doing up laces] ""The Batskates, yeah I know."""