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Joke of the Day
"I tried ballet, but I never got the pointe."
Next Joke
"Doctor: *taps knee with mallet* feel that? Me: No Doctor: or this? *jabs toe with a pin* Me: Nah Doctor: Just as I suspected. This is my leg"
"Weird how my first 11 coffees tasted like coffee but the 12th one tastes like I'm having a stroke."
"Two married man talking.. 1st man: Im so lucky, my wife is an angel. 2nd man: Good for you! Mine's still alive."
"What do you call it when a really large number marries a small number? A Ranged Marriage"
"What religious people say: ""I have you in my prayers."" What non-religious people hear: ""I'm trying to raise Aquaman on this cat radio."""
"Where do hipsters buy their clothes? Most likely a thrift store or Urban Outfitters, TBH."
"Dana White has his cock so far up Joe Rogan's ass When he farts it stutters credit /u/Blackirishman"
"What do you call a woman who sells sex for noodles? A Pasta-tute!"
"My friend Jay is going to name his newborn son ""K"" When I asked him why, he said he wanted to name him after himself."