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Joke of the Day

"My 7yo gave up a simple joke thats good enough 2 laugh at. Why did the chewing gum cross the road? Cause it was stuck on the chicken's foot!"

"It really doesn't matter what the tattoo across your collar bone says. All I see is ""My Dad Never Went To My Little League Games Sober."""

"Little Mermaid: I want to be where the people are Me: trust me u dont"

"Why was the tree in prison because it committed treeson"

"What's the MOST offensive religious joke you know?"

"What do you call someone who speaks 2 languages? Bilingual What do you call someone who speaks 3 languages? Trilingual. What do you call someone who speaks only 1 language? American."

"Facebook needs a Drama of the day section in my news feed."

"The trouble with being punctual is that nobody's there to appreciate it."

"Just forgot the word 'bagel' and had to say, ""round toast donut."" I think I'm having a stroke."

"I tried phone sex for the first time the other day... Didn't really like it though, the phone was too cold."