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Joke of the Day
"Whats black on top but white on bottom? Rape."
Next Joke
"""I could probz bench press, like, five of you""-me talking to a cool squirrel I just met"
"Guess who's the central character in the next Aliens movie ... Ripley, believe it or not!"
"I lost fifty pounds... Unfortunately, I was in England at the time."
"[Changes Siri to male] ME: Siri, tell me the MALE SIRI: Listen, here's what you need to know. ME: I... MALE SIRI: Excuse me, I'm speaking"
"I like my women how I like my file systems. FAT and 32"
"If 9/11 happened in Vegas, no one would have ever known due to that silly motto."
"Q: What is hail? A: Hard-boiled rain."
"Diarrhea is hereditary. Apparently it runs in your jeans."
"Are you my homework? Because I wanna slam you on my desk and do you all night."