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Joke of the Day

"I asked a Chinese girl for her number. She replied, ""Sex! Sex! Sex! Free sex tonight!"" I said, ""Wow!"" Then her friend said, ""She means 6663629."""

"Q: What's the difference between a car salesman and a computer salesman? A: The car salesman can probably drive!"

"Whenever I meet a girl with tattoos, I get excited. Because I know she's legal and willing to do stuff she may regret."

"What did the Marvel character say when he attained full control of his Android's CPU and Kernel? I am Root."

"I painted my computer black so it would run faster Now it doesn't work. Edit: Should I have tagged this with something? New to posting here"

"What's the hardest part of golf for asians? Driving"

"Girlfriend pressuring you to have a baby? Set the alarm on her phone to an infant screaming. If that doesn't changer her mind..DUMP HER!"

"What's a polar bear? It's a Cartesian bear after a co&ouml;rdinate transform."

"Me: If that baby won't stop crying I'm walking out & going to another restaurant. Gf: You used to do that too. Me: that was months ago."

"What do you get when you cross the Italian mafia with the Russian mafia? Thrown in a lake."