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Joke of the Day
"Where do terrorists go for a drink? The Allahu Ak-Bar."
Next Joke
"What do you call a white man on fire? A firecracker!"
"You should not disagree with my spear It has a point."
"How do you kill a vampire from the South? With a chicken fried stake"
"[camping] ""Dad I'm afraid a raccoon is gonna come in my tent and eat me"" -don't be silly. It'll probably be a bear. Sleep tight."
"Don't say ""tits."" It's crass and disrespectful. Instead, say ""lady tits."""
"Pizza is my second favourite thing to eat in bed... First favourite is cake."
"Splinter: Leo. Mikey: I'm Michelangelo. That's Leo. Donny: I'm Donatello. That's Leo. Leo: I thought I was Raphael. - Why they wear masks"
"At least cunts are useful you're not."
"An impressed man and his friend. Man: ""'Wow, you're omniscient!"" Friend: ""What does that mean?"" Man: ""Nevermind."""