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Joke of the Day

"Why couldn't Bing start a fire? No matches founds"

"My therapist told me that if ignorance is bliss, there's no reason for me to be on antidepressants."

"I'm feeling confident about my new business selling amphibious aircraft... It's going to be plane sailing!"

"r/politics That is all."

"America where we celebrate Memorial Day with mattress sales."

"I can't wait til my kids become adults so I can go over their houses & throw clean laundry all over the floor."

"A $7 voucher at the airport is like having 100 skeeball tickets at Chuck E Cheese: it sounds good on paper but won't get you anything decent"

"How did I win a Super Smash Bros. Brawl Tournament? I met a knight"

"What do you call optimistic lube? Lubrican"

"Why can't the T-rex do any push ups? Small arms? No it's because dinosaurs are extinct you dumbass."