127749

Joke of the Day

"I once went to a party with 10% battery life on my phone so you can shut the hell up about your ""scary"" battle at Normandy, grandpa."

"If Mature woman who likes young men is a Cougar. What is a Mature man who likes young women? An Inmate"

"What do you get when you cross a Mexican and a black man? Someone who steals your job then doesn't show up."

"My therapist told me I lack focus. I told him I liked his new desk."

"The day I let a dog make decisions for me ....Is the day I go blind."

"TIL why Conservatives don't use birth control. Boys don't get pregnant."

"When I'm drunk, I'm like South Park I'm crude and offends everyone"

"Batman opened a restaurant... But he's serving just desserts."

"Burger King needs a new slogan. Something like ""we clean our bathrooms now."""

"Dating is collecting information about someone until you realize you don't like them"