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Joke of the Day

"Last night I found out you can make a lot of people REALLY angry if you dress in a Star Trek costume and also carry a light saber"

"What do you call a tortoise in a shell suit? A tortoise."

"Turning 40 When my best friend turned 40, I sent him a CD in the mail: UB40. 2 months later, on my 40th, I received a CD in the mail from him: U2."

"I saw a documentary on how they make jeans... It was riveting."

"""How do you like your eggs?"" ""I like 'em just fine"""

"How do you make 5 pounds of fat look good? Put a nipple on it."

"What does a grizzly wear under his fur? Under-bear."

"[Meta] Anyone else hate jokes that are too long? They usually have too many characters."

"*Soccer Commentator* 'Adopted Children F.C. are having a great season, they might even make the playoffs this year if they can sort out their weakest position.' 'Nobody wants to be left back!'"

"If you want breakfast in bed, sleep in the kitchen."